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In a bold move today, President Bush strengthened the resolve of the United Nations by appointing a man with resolve to spare, John Bolton.

Bush noted that, "unlike Michael Bolton, who is happy to just sit at the dock of the bay, John Bolton has the resolve to eliminate the top ten floors of the UN building in New York." He added that if the UN didn't like that, it was just too bad because Bolton has the President's confidence, just like Karl Rove, Scooter Libby, Donald Rumsfeld, Ari Fleischer, Scott McLellan, Condi Rice and Dick Cheney.

Senators around the nation were unavailable for comment due to their August recess, but it is thought that the Senate would have approved of the President's appointment and the side-stepping of their right to checks and balances against the Executive Branch.